GIVE OUT, DON’T GIVE IN

Today, I did something totally out of character – I, Cocobeans, finally snapped and stood up to injustice!!
Don’t you hate the class freeloaders who never lift a proverbial finger in project groups yet take all the glory? You know, the Ronaldo of French class. Today I had enough. I went on a rant that was so persuasive, by the end of it all she offered to go to the teacher HERSELF and be removed from our final grade…because of my speech! I mean, it wasn’t exactly “I had a dream” worthy, but we’re still talking EPIC speech that resulted in woots and cheers from my classmates (well, ONE classmate, but still…). Move over, Michael D!

As good as it felt though, it is truly terrifying. I mean, in the grand scheme of things I’m not likely to be assassinated for my opinions or whatever (note to self: maybe don’t consider a career in politics…) but, it’s still daunting to stand up to someone like that.

DOOMED TO ERR

There are not many guarantees in life. Which can be a good or bad thing depending on your being a “glass half full” kind of person or not. Personally, I love the mystery of what’s to come (though, it would be nice to be sure I was going to get to the good stuff eventually…)

Anyway. One of the FEW guarantees in life is: we’re all going to make mistakes. It’s just up to us how spectacularly we make them, and I suppose how often.

It would appear I’m in a serious mistake-making ‘phase’. I mean, I keep saying and doing the wrong thing (like getting grounded for going to the cinema which is a TOTALLY harmless thing to do!! It’s not exactly a drugs and booze binge, Dad! ). And In mistaking the guy I thought I hated for the guy who actually likes me I’ve made drama class a bit of a…. drama.

But it’s comforting to know I’m not the only screw up around – isn’t there a clichéd saying like “you’re unique…just like everybody else”?

I find huge comfort in that – guess I’m a freak that way.

It’s time to get the old thinking cap on and start figuring out a way out of this mess…

DOOMED TO ERR…AND AMMEND

I’m back to continue my rant! (You know you love it really…)

After some serious soul searching (Ghandi had nothing on me), I’ve decided the only thing to do is tackle the mess that is My Life head on! Like, when you pull one loose thread but then EVERYTHING starts unravelling until you have nothing left but a big ball of string to start over with? That’s what needs to happen here. Kind of like how Cady in Mean Girls (yes, I’ve seen it) talks about sucking venom out of a snake bite…only, not quite so hardcore and well, I haven’t done anything close to alienating the entire school or having my teacher arrested. (Another reminder of the dullness that is My Life. I really need to work on that.)

Anyway! Thing is, everything’s bound to correct itself sooner or later. I’d just prefer it to be sooner so I can get back to the exciting world of Cocobeans and all that it entails, knowwotimsaying?

So it’s time to take the plunge, time to wear my heart on my sleeve, time to get the guy (time to stop using clichés), etc. No doubt I’m only going to make things worse, but at least it’ll give you something new to read about. Honestly, the things I do for you lot!!

COCO SAYS RELAX

Maybe things aren’t as bad as they appear. I know I’ve been a little dramatic the past while, but I genuinely felt like everything was starting to cave in around me and there was no way they’d get back on track. I’m a teen, what do you expect?!?

Here’s a shocker folks – things really do have a way of working themselves out!

I know, there is nothing worse than someone telling you everything is going to be fine when you really feel like the world is ending and can’t possibly see a way of fixing things. But it’s actually true! Everything has worked itself out in life up until this point, and it will continue to work itself out. I’m not going to tell you that things happen for a reason, blah blah blah – I don’t see any silver linings in being grounded to the point of missing the end of term party – but, I will tell you to just relax because eventually you won’t be grounded and there will be another party. And, like this blogger, if you stop fretting about it you may even get the guy!

Promise I’ll stop pretending to be your parents now. But if I can manage to survive, there’s hope for you all!

Until next time, blogosphere – COCOBEANS

MURPHY’S LAW

You know how when you say ”things couldn’t possibly get any worse”, they always somehow do?? I made the mistake of tempting Madam Fate today by actually saying the words “at least things can’t get any worse”.

Should I really be surprised that they have? I totally brought this one on myself.

When I feel like everything is just going wrong and blowing up in my face (like RIGHT NOW), I tend to just want to crawl into a black hole (my bed will also do) and hide away forever until they sort themselves out again. Only, I don’t think things will sort themselves out this time unless I actually try to fix stuff. Which I would of course prefer to not have to do.

I don’t want to make things worse by naming names and giving details here folks, but let’s just say I thought I was getting signals from a guy, put my foot in it, and now everything is quite the mess. That’s what I get for trying to exist outside to Blogosphere.

Maybe I could change my name and move to a different country…it’s never too late to start over, right?? What’s the weather like in Italy these days…

GIVE OUT, DON’T GIVE IN

Today, I did something totally out of character – I, Cocobeans, finally snapped and stood up to injustice!!
Don’t you hate the class freeloaders who never lift a proverbial finger in project groups yet take all the glory? You know, the Ronaldo of French class. Today I had enough. I went on a rant that was so persuasive, by the end of it all she offered to go to the teacher HERSELF and be removed from our final grade…because of my speech! I mean, it wasn’t exactly “I had a dream” worthy, but we’re still talking EPIC speech that resulted in woots and cheers from my classmates (well, ONE classmate, but still…). Move over, Michael D!

As good as it felt though, it is truly terrifying. I mean, in the grand scheme of things I’m not likely to be assassinated for my opinions or whatever (note to self: maybe don’t consider a career in politics…) but, it’s still daunting to stand up to someone like that.

DOOMED TO ERR

There are not many guarantees in life. Which can be a good or bad thing depending on your being a “glass half full” kind of person or not. Personally, I love the mystery of what’s to come (though, it would be nice to be sure I was going to get to the good stuff eventually…)

Anyway. One of the FEW guarantees in life is: we’re all going to make mistakes. It’s just up to us how spectacularly we make them, and I suppose how often.

It would appear I’m in a serious mistake-making ‘phase’. I mean, I keep saying and doing the wrong thing (like getting grounded for going to the cinema which is a TOTALLY harmless thing to do!! It’s not exactly a drugs and booze binge, Dad! ). And In mistaking the guy I thought I hated for the guy who actually likes me I’ve made drama class a bit of a…. drama.

But it’s comforting to know I’m not the only screw up around – isn’t there a clichéd saying like “you’re unique…just like everybody else”?

I find huge comfort in that – guess I’m a freak that way.

It’s time to get the old thinking cap on and start figuring out a way out of this mess…COCOBEANS

Sometimes when I speak, I really wish I could grab the words and shove them back into my mouth so everyone can just carry on like I never said anything. This is why being online is so much easier than being around people face to face because I can re-write what I’m trying to say and read over it before I send it out into the universe. I have much more control over what I’m saying that way then when I just open my mouth and let words fall out like tiny little disasters dropping all over my life.

Today I said a few things in class that I, let’s just say, shouldn’t have. Now I’ve got a chunk of detention and I’m pretty sure all the teachers are now wondering whether I’ll join the Crips or the Bloods. Then when I got home and told Dad why, he pretty much hit the roof. So, I said a few more things I shouldn’t have said. Didn’t exactly help my situation…

He says I have a penchant for dramatics and need to learn to control my emotions. (I stormed out of the room when he said that and then googled ‘penchant’. Now I’m angry I stormed out of the room and proved his point.)

WEB OF LIES

There is no absolutely nothing more frustrating than not being able to do the things you enjoy simply because someone else tells you that you can’t.

Take, for instance, when a certain overbearing parent threatens to take your laptop to try and impose ‘helping out around the house’. Isn’t that what butlers are paid for? Doesn’t he think that maybe it would be way more effective if he offered a reward, like giving power to the ultimate trophy, The Great Remote Control?? Like, I’m not his slave.

Sometimes adults don’t understand the pressures of being a teenager and all the responsibilities that come along with it. And I’m not just talking about family-type responsibilities, we have lives to lead!! I’d much prefer to spend time doing things that make me happy then being forced into doing other stuff just for the sake of it. Call me crazy, but isn’t that the whole point of life? To do what makes you happy and not feel like a terrible human being for it??

MY thoughts on … ADULTS THESE DAYS

Do you ever say something because you know it’s what people want to hear, rather than just saying what you really think? I’ve Sometimes I’d much rather just be done with a conversation rather than having to argue about stuff (especially when you know you’re right).

Of course, it turns out it’s easier to just be honest the first time around because it takes twice as much time to correct things later on. Oh, the irony.

My aunt recently asked me if I liked adventure parks, I said yes (lie #1). She asked if I’d ever been rock climbing before, I said yes (lie #2). She asked me if I liked sleepovers, I thought it an odd question but still said yes (lie #3). She then asked me if I had any plans this weekend, I said no (that was the truth. What was I thinking?). And then she insisted that I come to my snot-covered little cousin’s bday bash. How didn’t I see this coming?

So now there’s a ticket with my name on it to go rock climbing on the kitchen table this Saturday afternoon. I have a serious fear of heights and I’m not exactly that fond of the brat.

Looks like I’m going to have to pull the biggest fake-sicky in history…COCOBEANS

There are good ideas, and then there are bad ideas. It would seem lately most of my ideas have been falling into the second of those categories. (Who knew deciding to go to the cinema after school without telling Dad first would result in me being grounded for a whole week? Over-reaction much??)

The problem isn’t so much that I have bad ideas – don’t they say for every good decision there are a hundred bad ones behind it? (Maybe they don’t say that, but they should! Because in my case it’s totally true…) The problem is that I don’t always know it’s a bad idea until it’s too late. (I mean really, does he think I wouldn’t have called if I knew he was going to ground me? It’s common sense here, people!)

My other problem is I tend to get carried away by my ideas until I’m so deep into them that there’s really nowhere to go but down, very very quickly. If anyone’s going to install a virus while attempting to download ‘free’ software, it’s going to be. If anyone’s going to get caught sneaking out, it’s going to be me.

So I’ve come up with another idea I’m pretty sure can’t go wrong: learn to think.things.through. – and I’m talking all angles here. Very Zen and grown up of me, no?

If there’s hope for me, there’s hope for anyone.

DOUBLE LIFE…IS THERE AN APP FOR THAT?

Sometimes it’s hard to keep up with myself. When I’m home, I’m constantly plugged in and logged on. At any given moment, I can be having multiple conversations with many different people – all while I’m sitting here on my laptop, alone in my room. (Not actually ON my laptop, genius.)

My online-self is evolving at a faster rate than my ‘real world’ self and sometimes I find myself thinking of comments I’d easily type out, but I never actually say them out loud. Crazy much? (Don’t answer that – my guess is if you’re reading this, you’re equally net-dependent as me!)

But do we need to worry when there comes a point that we prefer interacting with the people and the world online instead of face to face? Where do I begin and the many Internet versions of me end? If only there were a way of downloading my online life so I could carry it around with me in ‘real life’. Now there’s an app I’d pay for.

BEHIND THE CURTAIN

Today is one of those days where I really feel wise beyond my years. I mean, more so then normal – because let’s face it, I am pretty much a genius. But that’s a whole other blog entry.

No, today I came to the realisation that so many people don’t really have a clue what’s going on around them. It’s pretty fun actually, if you sit back and watch everyone going about their daily lives (not in a stalker way, obviously, just in a people-gazing kind of way). You can totally see through people if you look hard enough. Half the time people say one thing, but really mean another. Kind of like when parents bark “because I said so” when you question their orders. We all know it really means “I haven’t a clue, I’m a sadist don’t you know”.

I challenge you all today to look for the real meaning behind what people are saying to you – it’s fun trying to decode everything and at the very least it gives you something to do when you’re bored.

Laters – COCOBEANS

They say youth is wasted on the young, that we waste our energy and time online and playing video games instead of enjoying life and putting our skills to good use.

I say adults forget what it’s like to be young – the mental torture of growing up and figuring out who you are and what you want to be when, let’s face it, we’re barely allowed to do anything. I happily say give me the keys to the car and I’ll drive myself down to the animal shelter and help find the abandoned kittens new homes! Do you think Dad will hand me the keys? Yeah, right. He’d sooner cut off his own arm then allow me in the driver’s seat. (He said something about the car being a weapon of mass destruction? And we’re supposed to be the dramatic one?)

Youth isn’t wasted on the young; it’s kidnapped by the old!! And who says spending time online or playing video games or txting your friends is a waste of time anyway? Maybe you’re destined to be the next Steve Jobs or whoever…

So the next time someone tries to tell you to stop doing something you like to start doing something else, just think ‘What would Steve do?’

Embrace yourself, blogettes, maybe one day you’ll be laughing all the way to the bank…

GOOD THINGS COME TO THOSE WHO STOP TALKING

Have you ever noticed the way adults use a bunch of really annoying phrases all the time? “Good things come to those who wait”; “don’t judge a book by its cover”; or my Dad’s personal favourite “all the world’s a stage, and all the men and women merely players”. Bleugh!

I can’t tell you the amount of times Dad has said to me “be careful what you wish for”. Most of the time he doesn’t know what he’s talking about. How would I regret having the new iPhone exactly? Or going on a sun holiday this summer for once? He always brings up the time I wished for a snow day from school and within twenty minutes of getting one, I’d fallen over and broken my ankle.

The only thing that annoys me more than people stating the obvious is people who are right about it.

RANT TIME…

In drama this week, we spent an entire class doing improvisation. The art of creating something out of nothing based on the people and things around you. A line is fed to you and suddenly you become something else, creating a life off the top of your head. No matter what happens, no matter what’s said, you can’t break character – otherwise the magic is lost and the jig is up. You’re just back to being you and everyone knows it was pretend.

It’s kind of funny when you think about it, because so much of life is just an act or improvisation. Funny as in strange, not funny as in LOL. And most the time other people just ruin it anyway. It really bothers me when someone’s talking to me and I can tell they’re being fake or don’t really mean what they’re saying.

I know, I know – I can practically see you rolling your eyes from here. All I’m saying is, what’s the point? It gets exhausting trying to be someone you’re not all the time. Trust me, I know. I’ve done it too (shock, horror! Yes I can make mistakes too…)

And so concludes another episode of “things that bug me”. Stay tuned folks, plenty more where that came from…COCOBEANS

“If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again.”

That was not what I wanted to see written on the whiteboard at 9am this morning. But in light of a few recent ‘online bullying’ incidents, apparently our genius Principal decided every class in school needed to participate in ‘team building’ and ‘life skills’ seminars today. I know, kill me. (On the upside, I missed double maths!)

Anyway, it was all about never giving up in the face of adversity, learning to be yourself, trust your instincts, don’t make fun of others, yadda yadda yadda…explain to me how catching someone as they purposely fall backwards is going to give you life skills exactly? When am I ever going to suddenly decide to fall backwards? No one would suddenly step up to catch me; they’d just step around or over me.

3 hours later (including being held in over lunch for bad behaviour), we had a room of bored students, frustrated teachers, and paramedics tending to the chump who wasn’t caught and cracked their head on the ground. And, there’s rumours we have to redo the seminars next week. Will they ever learn?

What I’m saying folks is, “if at first you don’t succeed – burn all evidence of ever trying”.

WILL I EVER CATCH A BREAK?

Do you ever have one of those days when you wish you’d just stayed in bed? Like, you can’t seem to catch a break and everything is going wrong?

Today started simply with burnt toast. If I hadn’t burnt it, I never would have stopped by the shop to buy my breakfast. Then I wouldn’t have missed my bus and ended having to wait for 15 minutes, like a total plank, in the rain. If I hadn’t been standing by that puddle, then I never would have been soaked by the idiot in the pink Honda. (Seriously, pink Honda? That’s like putting slippers on your pet Rottweiler).

And that was all before 9am. It was only downhill from there. To recap for you quickly, the rest of my day consisted of a surprise French grammar test (totally failed), botched chemistry experiment (I need a new shirt) and detention for not wearing the correct uniform (courtesy of the previously mentioned chem. experiment fiasco).

If my life were a movie, it would be a comedy no one finds funny. Like Sex and the City 2.

Ah well, tomorrow’s a new day and there’s plenty of disasters with my name on it waiting to happen. Can’t wait…

MY NEW PLAN: MAKE A BETTER BUCKET LIST.

Pretend for a minute that you could not only be anyone in the world you wanted, but you could do anything you wanted. What would that be? If this were a beauty pageant, I’d have to say things like “create world peace” or “save the Amazon”. Well, lucky for me I’m not trying to become the next Miss Botox so I can choose whatever I want.

I started making a bucket list – you know, things to do before I kick the bucket/die/meet that great flying spaghetti monster in the sky. Help me leave an imprint or whatever. If you’ve only got one life, you might as well take the reigns and do something interesting with it, right?

So far, I’ve come up with:

• Learn to play the guitar (properly)
• Travel
• Win an Oscar
• Pretend said Oscar means nothing to me in subsequent interviews
• Invent something (suggestions welcome)
• Make a better bucket list

Hey, it’s a work in progress and I’m only just getting started…

Until next time internet…

COCOBEANS x

A letter was sent home from school today warning parents about “cyber-bullying”. Some idiots in fifth year hacked this guy’s Facebook account and posted fake status updates and wrote different things on a few peoples’ walls. The guy totally freaked out and didn’t come into school for three days. I suppose it has to be pretty embarrassing to have the whole school suddenly know who you are because of a stupid prank. In fairness to the “culprits”, the guy left his Facebook page OPEN in the computer room so it’s not like they deliberately set out to target him, it was simply a “seize the day” frape moment.

But the things they posted were all lame stuff – like, “I love farting in the bath” and “Hi Rosie, if you’re thinking of getting me a Christmas present this year don’t forget how much I love wearing make up.”
Seriously? Of everything they choose to write, they choose to talk about farting and dressing like a girl? Anyone with a half a brain reading that stuff would know it was a prank. Now everyone’s saying how sorry they feel for Mr X (let’s call him that to spare him any further online scandals for today), but it’s the hackers who I’m embarrassed for. A note was sent home from school – the biggest scandal since the Great Lice Disaster of 2010 – and when people ask what for, the reply will be “because they hacked Mr X’s FB profile and posted about how much he loved farting.”

If you were given the chance to get away with pretending to be someone else, would you take it? How do you know I’m not someone else pretending to be a Dublin schoolgirl? (I’m not, by the way. Trust me – if I could invent a persona to hide behind online, I’d choose someone far more interesting then myself.) That’s the problem with all this online and texting stuff, how do we ever know who we’re talking to? Sometimes I get paranoid I’m not really talking to who I think I’m talking to and I’m being set up by someone else.
It’s a big bad world out there, folks, so here’s my helpful tip of the day: always log out of your accounts, especially when you’re using a public computer.

BUT MEANWHILE…

…do you ever feel like everyone else has this whole ‘life’ thing figured out and you’re being left behind? I feel like everyone else is always doing stuff and I’m just on my own. Though I suppose I’m not totally alone because I have you guys reading this. (Right? Is there anyone actually out there? Echo Echooooo!!) On the up side I’m finally on top of all my homework…man, my life is tragic.

I think dad senses I’m feeling kind of down because he offered to take me to the movies this weekend…only, how sad would that be if I turned up at the cinema with him and then saw a load of people from school all there together?

I guess I’m getting a bit bored of doing the same stuff over and over. Maybe I need a new hobby – but I don’t know what I’d want to start doing. Why can’t I just plug my brain into some kind of machine and have it tell me what I should be doing? Or what I’d like to be doing? It would make my life so much easier.
Oh well.

My thoughts on…MAKIN’ DO

Stone the crows! Stop the presses! Today was a surprisingly good day.

Waking up and feeling that crushing realisation that today was going to be the same as every other day, I decided enough is enough and it was time to take matters into my own hands. Instead of turning on my laptop before even eating my breakfast like I normally do, I decided to organise my room.

I know. How boring. I actually chose to tidy my room. But bear with me, I promise this is going somewhere.

I threw out a LOAD of old stuff that I just don’t even need anymore and then I found my old paint set hidden at the back of my wardrobe (under a bunch of clothes I forgot I had!). So I spent most of today painting. I forgot how much I liked it. So I guess I can cross finding a new hobby off my list of things-to-do, or at least push it down the list a bit. Though technically it’s resurrecting an old hobby…whatever. Point is, I’ve found something to do in my spare time!

Of course, my laptop and the cyber-world have felt grossly neglected all day as a result. Don’t worry though folks, I’ll still be here to entertain you with my fascinating anecdotes and intellectual ramblings. I know you’d be lost with them.

Until next time…

COCOBEANS

I actually learned something in school today. What gives? Anyway, apparently Penicillin was discovered by mistake. One of the most important discoveries in medical history was a m-i-s-t-a-k-e. I mean, that’s pretty funny when you think about it. Where would we be if that guy Fleming hadn’t messed up and discovered the miracle drug?

I guess where I’m going with this is…well, I kind of screwed up tonight. My Dad asked me if I’d handed in the spare key to the old wrinkle-bag next door and I wasn’t really paying attention – but I said yes because I knew I was meant to do it. So, it was sort of a mistake…though I doubt it will end in some amazing world-altering discovery.

It’s not like I meant to lie, it just kind of happened. How was I supposed to know the alarm would go off and she’d need to get in to deal with it? It’s not like I killed anyone or anything – he just loves being dramatic! I didn’t exactly plan on keeping the key, going out and then leaving the house alarm blaring down the street for an hour. Why do parents always overreact anyway? If it was that important he should have said something in the first place.

Does anyone else ever feel like their parents are waiting for any excuse to freak out at them? If I’m the only one then I may as well give up now…laters, COCOBEANS

My thoughts on… Karma Sucking

“Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.” Oscar Wilde.

So I have to write a 1,000 word essay on this by Monday. There goes my weekend! As if I want to spend it thinking of things to say about forgiveness and enemies and frenemies and all that stuff. Lucky me.

I’m not sure I totally agree with Mr Wilde on this one. Last year, an ex-friend of mine who shall remain nameless (let’s just say it rhymes with “Meera”) used my phone to text this guy I liked and told him I didn’t like him. A week later, she was going out with him! I’ve never been so mad and upset. (They were only together three weeks before he dumped her for another friend though. I believe that, ladies and gents, is what they call karma.)

Anyway, I was really really upset about it and we had a huge fight and stopped being friends. Obviously. Not that she was ever my friend in the first place I guess. But if I forgave her, it wouldn’t annoy her – it would make her happy because then she wouldn’t be a bad person anymore. Clearly Mr Wilde didn’t think about every possible situation before he came up with that gem.

What am I supposed to write in the essay? I can hardly use that example, Meera is in my class and the teacher would know straight away. Then again, I’d love to see the look on her face if I did. Hmmmm…

My thoughts on … FUTURE TALK

If you could be absolutely anyone in the world for one day, who would it be?

I always think about things like that, like maybe I could be Lady Gaga and have everyone know who I am, or maybe I could be like a kick-ass ice-skater and be the first Irish person to win an Olympic Gold medal for it. (No-one’s won a gold medal for that in Ireland yet have they?)

I went to an all-ages gig in Whelans last night – which was AMAZABALLS!! There was a girl there with a really big camera right at the front of the crowd taking photos and she looked so cool and I suddenly thought what a deadly job that would be – going around taking pictures of famous bands and stuff. But then the band came on stage and I saw how much fun they were having singing to the crowd and I really wanted to do that too.

Why don’t they let us think about doing those kinds of things in school? I don’t know what I want to do in college yet, how am I supposed to start thinking about subjects like Applied Maths or Chemistry? (By the way, major snore…) What other really cool jobs aren’t they telling us about?

In English today I read that Oscar Wilde once said, “be yourself, everyone else is already taken”. (Duh.) But that’s easy for some big-shot writer to say, isn’t it? There’s no way he knew at ten years old he wanted to be a writer. I bet he had an older brother he used to follow all the time and copy when he was growing up. He was hardly original his whole life.

I know some people in my class have it all figured out and know exactly what course they want to do and in what college. Yup, advanced accountancy suits you to a tee, Poindexter. But, does anyone else ever feel like they have no idea how to even start thinking about what they want to do and who they want to be?

Yo, cyber-freaks, guys and trolls, and welcome to my new blog… tah dah!

So who is this wonderful, witty, mysterious blogger that has come out of the virtual woodwork to guide you through teenage life’s pangs? Who knows! My rather mental father told me today that he doesn’t know who I am anymore. He barely recognizes me. Well excuse me for growing up, isn’t that what I’m meant to be doing? He said I’m “not enthusiastic”. I’m “indifferent.” I’ve changed”. Whatever. It’s hard to be enthusiastic about family night when family’s just you and a 40-something-year-old man who thinks emotions are best expressed through song. (I know.)

It’s as if he thinks I’m a pod person, or I’ve secretly joined some teenage cult that’s making me act different from “normal”. But isn’t it “normal” to change? Does he expect me to watch High School Musical for the rest of my life? And where does it say you have to be consistent anyway? Just because he doesn’t see me playing the violin as much anymore and I’ve started putting my teddies (from, hello – when I was seven) into a box under my bed doesn’t mean I’m not still me.

Oscar Wilde said ‘’consistency is the last refuge of the unimaginative” (and if it’s a quote, it has to be true). For those of you whose only language as txt-speak that means nobody is just one person. I mean, I’ve got about four identities in cyberspace (five now actually if you count this blog), even if I am just fading away in ‘real life’. So what? They’re all me, they’re just different versions of me. I’m sure in a few years I’ll be totally different again. To quote Taylor Swift, “this is life before you know who you’re going to be”.

Did I just quote Taylor Swift??? … ANYWAY, as you’ve probably noticed, I have a few opinions. Here are my opinions on being yourself…

My Advice on… BEING YOURSELF…

Have you ever noticed how parents and teachers are always telling you to “be yourself” and “have your own opinions”? But all they really mean is to be the way they want you to be and think the same stuff they think. I have opinions, I have plenty of them! Like, I have opinions on having to be home by 9pm on Fridays. I also have opinions on not being allowed use our phones in school and on people who wear jeggings (don’t even get me started on that one)…

Just because I don’t want to talk in depth about The Scarlet Letter in front of my whole class doesn’t mean I don’t have an opinion on it. I mean read between the lines here, people.

‘If a tree falls in a forest and no-one’s around to hear it, does it still make a sound’? I say it totally does. I mean, I know I’m making all kinds of noises and saying loads of things that no-one seems to hear. Just because they don’t hear me doesn’t mean I’m not there trying to be heard. Don’t cats and dogs make noises that aren’t in our sound register to hear? Doesn’t mean they’re not communicating, just means we’re not listening properly. So keep that in mind next time Spot squeaks as you’re trying to squeeze him into a Paul’s Boutique doggy-sized jacket.

I wonder what would happen if I told dad to stop talking about music and talk to me instead about The X Factor – I bet he wouldn’t have any big opinions on that subject! But you don’t see me rolling my eyes and telling him to ‘find his own voice’ – he’d probably just take my laptop from me again. See? Sometimes it’s best to just keep your thoughts to yourself…

My Thoughts On… BASIC INSTINCT…

We’re all born with basic instincts, right (and no, boys, I don’t mean it like that. Stop drooling on the carpet)?

We’re supposed to know what’s right and wrong, we’re supposed to be able to weigh up our options and choose the one that’s most likely to succeed. But what happens when you know you’re meant to do one thing, but then doing it will just cause chaos for everyone else? I mean look at Romeo and Juliet – following their instincts on “true love” or whatever ended in mass bloodshed and total disaster. And he only got the girl for five minutes – not exactly what I’d call a successful outcome.

People are always telling me to think about the consequences of my actions, but then say to follow my gut – which is a major problem when you’re as “impulsive” as I am. Think about it, though – one decision today can alter your entire life’s path!! That’s some pretty serious pressure. Maybe my jet-black shoes today will be the reason I don’t go to college, or maybe missing my bus this morning will result in me finally getting that bike I want.

The way I see it, nobody has it figured out. All the adults I know are pretty much guessing their way through life too, but you don’t see me poking my nose in and telling them what to do! So leave me alone to make my choices and mistakes and I’ll leave you alone to make yours. Have you ever done anything that you actually 100% regret? Probably not, right?

And on that note folks, I’m signing off…laters – COCOBEANS